i HATE her...

i don't know why.
there is a strong feeling right inside me.
hatred.
i HATE her.
since the 1st time i saw her i dislike her.
since the day i know she always insult people around her,i know i didn't accuse her.
she is indeed a BAD person.
since the day she insulted my mother, i HATE her!
she did insulted me before but i can ignore that because i always insult myself :)

i thought i won't bear grudge.
i thought i can forget but i'm wrong.
i can't do it.
forgive and forget is something i can't do and i don't feel like learning to do so.
perhaps hating someone will make myself suffer but i can't help hating whoever that hurt me.
perhaps he or she will change one day but i won't forget the things they did on me.



last year,i saw her on facebook as new user.
saw her profile photo.
my 1st reaction:YUCKS~!
then,i forget about her.

recently,accidentally saw her 'menyampah' face again.
my curiousity made me clicked.
i viewed her profile.
surprisingly, the 1st thing i am concern of is her friends.
perhaps i should say my friends that i label as important friends to me.
i was there searching and looking hard.
wish they didn't request or accept her as siblings.
feel relieve when i didn't see any of them in her siblings list.
i don't know why i always wanted to know,am i more important than her in their heart.
is my status as their friend a little higher than her?
or am i below her?


a conffession to be make here.
dear st. johners or ex-st.johners friends of mine who treat her as friend,
i actually did a cruel thing on her and yet i didn't regret.
when i told my sis about this,she said she can't imagine it and she thought i won't do so.
she thought my evilness is just verbal evilness not action.
after she said that,i do think i did a little too over BUT after a few weeks,i don't feel bad anymore.
if i am given a chance to undo it,
i won't undo.

my dear st.johners and ex-st.johner friends,
did you all remember i scolded a friend of yours?
i hide some of the actual story from you all because i wasn't prepare to tell you all yet.
now i am prepared.
perhaps only 1 of you all will have the chance to read since the other....
seldom online?
forgotten my blog address?
well...
erm...
here it is.

i hate her.
she make me angry(reason:simply insult people).
i planned a revenge.

on the report card day,
i planned to scold her in front of her mother but that didn't happened.
i scolded her earlier.
during reccess time.
i shouted at her.

me :XXX~!你干嘛!!!!!!干嘛满街唱衰我?!!!
XXX :我没有～(in a pretend she's a 斯文person...using soft tone.YUCKS~!)
me :你有!!!!!!
XXX :我真的没有.(装楚楚可怜的表情)[恶心死了!]
me :有啊!我又没有得罪你你干嘛唱衰我!
XXX : 我几时唱衰过你?
Me : 你干嘛到处乱跟人讲我是私生女?你凭什么酱讲!你怎么会知道我是不是!
XXX : 我猜的啦．
Me : 这种东西哪有的猜的!!!!!你还到处讲是我画黑板!说是我用黑板来侮辱你!你那个眼睛看到啊!蛤!

(i think i scold some other stuff too but i can't really remember...)

Then, TSY pulled me away. Take me back to my class because she saw the discipline teacher and the H.E.M. I was in my class crying and that girl crying in the canteen. Others told me that the discipline teacher and the H.E.M. got find her. Have a talk with her or what I don’t know.
All I know is that no teacher come to find me. In our class, we argued once more. Then, she started to feel scared. She kept on saying sorry and begged me not to say a thing to her mother.

i guess...i won in that 'battle'. But i won in a dirty way.


The things she insulted me, i wrote back on the black board 2 days after she said so just to make her mad.
i worte twice.using my left hand.
she did get mad.
she knew the person who wrote that used left hand.
she showed those 'kua zheong' facial expression and shouted madly in the class like a mad dog.
i was there in the corner where i used to sit smiling evilly.

every classmate of mine that saw those things i wrote kinda shocked but none of them feel like rubbing it.
even some said let it be there.let her see.i want to know what's her reaction.
i am very sure the 1st person she suspect is me but i wasn't afraid.
she started telling those people around her i did that.
then some of my classmates said it back to me.
i pretended as if i am a victim.
pretended that i didn't do so.
most of my classmates stand at my side.most of them believed me.
then,when someone told me she even tell those not from my class i wrote that, i used the reason she 'fitnah' me and went to scold her.
i am very x999999999999999999999999999 bad and evil right?

thinking back about what i did to her,i did feel bad but after i type it out and read again i feel 5 times worst.
am i really that evil until me myself can't stand the evilness hidden beneath me?
or am i just can't get use to the evil me because i am used to hear people saying i am a good person?
i don't get it.
i always see myself as a bad,evil and cruel person but people that know me for some time always say i am a good person.
anyway,i promise myself i won't do such thing anymore because i feel really bad for weeks.
however,i still hate her.

p.s.do you feel scared or feel like running away from me after you read this post?

erm..simone and jean mae..ignore the chinese words...in fact you can ignore the whole post.i told both of you before about this incident.

exhausted~~~

tada~~~~~~!
the reason i am EXTREMELY EXHAUSTED today....

i've been drawing this since yesterday 2pm until today morning 5am~~~~!!!!
only stop a while to eat dinner and didn't even have time to take a bath!

this is the original version...for you all to compare...:)


i can't stand anymore when the clock strikes 5am.
i went to sleep,set alarm for 6.10am but i DIDN'T WAKE UP~!
OMG~!i was too tired until i can't even hear it ringing....
i woke up at 7am and got crazzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzy~~~
hate myself sooooooooo much because oversleep...

however,i didn't continue drawing right after i woke up...
i can't stand the odour...
I WAS EXTREMELY SMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLY~~~
YUCKS~!
i went to bath then i continue drawing until my roommates prepare to walk with me to the lrt station...
i brought sandwich and force myself eat quickly inside the lrt.
then walked quickly to the campus without considering to walk together with them.
sorry~~~~~~~~
then i continue drawing again...
still drawing even when the lecture entered...
well...
he let me draw...
i draw until 10.35am i think...
then quickly snap a photo for my 'hasil titik peluh'...

after that i can't really remember what i did...
i guess due to lack of sleep i can't do things properly...
i even suffer short term lost memory...
can't really remember what i did yet not sleepy...

however,after i reached my 'home'...
the 1st thing i do is sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep =D
i feel soooooooo energetic after the 2 hour sleep.
haha....
after sleeping,get naughty again.
online and don't do assignments...
uh oh~~~
mati liao le....
haiz~
don't care first la...
want enjoy =P
p.s.i've uploaded this photo in facebook...
please click 'like' if you think it's nice...
thanks =)

fulfill my promise ^^

hi,people!
i'm here to fulfill my promise.
i've promised to post about my birthday.
so....
here it is =)

before this let's talk about the previous birthday of my roommate on 9th June.
my another roommate make her these!
red eggs~~~
we woke up early that day to make her these.

although the eggs were not red enough but she was extremely touched and gave each of us a hug...
hooi chuen(the girl same birthday with me)think of this...
so.....
i don't really did something to make her touched.
that day after class we went out to walk walk until dinner time.
then we belanja her.
...........................................


on 21st June 2010,
two girls that born on 21st June 1992 turned 18th and get these as their birthday present!
爱心早餐! <3
the name is made by bread.
the breakfast xin lin woke up 2-3hours earlier than us to make it.
THANK YOU~~~!
i was really happy because it's the 1st time getting such sweet present on my birthday.
really very happy ^^

this one get from another friend.

we called her Sien Mei Mei since she's the youngest among us....

(sien because her name is hui sien)

well...the card is nice.

the present....i don't think i'll use....

she gave us nail polish...

if she give black i might use...

other colours....no.

hmm~~~

after our class,we went to kl.

took quite long to reach kl.

around 10 station from campus to reach klcc station.

we went there because Sien Mei Mei want to teach us the shortcut from klcc to reach 4 other shopping centre.

hehe....

we stopped at Secret Recipe to enjoy our tea time =)

surprisingly,me and another birthday girl choose the same flavour 'tiramisu cheese' cake!

hehe...

this is hers....

this is mine.erm...from these two photos,proven my capture photo skill not as good as hers =(

Oops~~~!

two birthday girl being 偷拍!

haha=D

then we took some photos....=)

later,we went to Pavillion shopping centre.

walk a while then entered a restaurant(wong kok char chan teng).

*xin lin with her noodles...

*hooi chuen with her 'lai liu ha' fried rice.

this is sien mei mei.she didin't eat....

said want diet=(

nice view huh?

she choose this place.

straight away go inside then side down as if it's her house.

LOL~!

ME~~~~~!hugging the big 香港奶茶/hong kong teh tarik and my dinner ;)

if there is a birthday girl/boy in the group,you'll get one big hk teh tarik free.

although we got 2 birthday girl,we only get one.=(

that's all....

for more photos,go to facebook.

if can,click like<3

the album name is sweet sweet 18th birthday.

bye~~~

lazzzzzy V is back...

i am getting lazzzzzzzzzzzzzier and crazzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzier....
haiz~~~
when i wanted to post blog,
i was busy.
when i am free,
't remember what i want to post......
=.=lll

矛盾...

i came here....
feel like posting something
BUT...
when i reach here,
i can't remember what i want to post.
=.=lll
well...
just done my assignments.
complete 10 A4 size sketches of buildings in a week!
rush like hell~!
then today get another assignment.
also 10 sketches but this time A3 size!
need to think what to sketch somemore!
ARGH~!
i'm dead meat this time.
i've got no idea... :'(

project:build a sulpture or modal
theme:1 Malaysia
material:wood,stitch and mounting board.

urgh....why must 1 Malaysia theme?
*suffering~~~*

unexpected tour....

yesterday went to 'chi chong gai'...
also known as jalan petaling a.k.a china town.
do you know why we(me and hooi chuen[the girl same birthday with me]) suddenly went there?
because we thought there will be bus taking us back to hostel at 5pm.
thus we went to library to online and do assignment due to afraid locking ourselves in extremely 'kampung' places such as the hostel...
when the clock struck 2pm,we felt kinda creepy....
the people in the library getting lesser....
usually during 12pm till 4pm,the library is full of human being onlining there....
yesterday after 2,not more than 10 people left.
we saw none of our hostel mates.
proven there won't be bus coming to fetch us.

i suggested that we should go somewhere shopping or have a walk before we go back to the hostel since we need to go kl then only we can take a bus back to puchong.
at first i suggested to go to bukit bintang since lot 10,times square,pavillion and sungai wang are there BUT it's kinda troublesome to find a bus back to puchong from that place....
we need to take lrt then komuter only we can reach the correct bus station.
so...
we changed our mind.
called and ask xin lin(the one from terengganu)where she and her boyfriend is.
*her boyfriend purposely came down from kelantan to meet her.
pity them.
1 from terengganu another from kelantan.
1/2 year meet once....*
she told us she's in mid valley.
we planned to go there BUT not to 'kacau daun'...
just...easier for us to meet and go back together.
after waiting for the bus for around 10 minutes...i change my mind again.
i don't feel like going to mid valley again so i told her let's go to pasar seni then go chi chong gai.
we went to the lrt station and began our journey.:D
we went to pasar seni a.k.a. central market.
some of the sovenirs kinda amuse us.
i didn't have photos to show :(
my phone...cheap model...take picture not really nice and actually we are not allow to take pictures but my friend took some :)
besides sovenirs,we saw a few other interesting stuff but i'm kinda lazy to describe.

then we walked a few streets before we reach chi chong gai...
erm...we walk walk and see see things...
then we look for a place to sit down and online because the laptop is tooooooo heavy
:(

we went into a kfc nearby.
their wifi connection not good.
in the end,i used my own boardband...
i saw jean mae online but status AWAY...
sent some crap but didn't reply a thing :'(
waited for a long time but still...
no reaction.
then when simone on...
this came out...

ATTENTION!BATTERY LOW!

:(
only 5 more minutes to go....
chat with simone for 5 minutes then poof!screen turn black.
i've got nothing to do there.
can't online and done eating while onlining...

my friend scared i bored so...
she offline then we walked to the popular nearby.
we called xin lin and told her when she reached contact us.
then both of us observed the magazines covers because we need to design magazine cover...
our assignment...

haiz~don't want type anymore le..
long and boring post...
1 think i don't like happened.
my sis told my mum i'm in chi chong gai!
:'(
that time was around 9pm.
mum sure worry....
haiz~

what type of guy i like....

someone asked me this yesterday...
i actually don't really know the answer since i don't really have a chance to fall in love.
haha=D
well...
i guess i like mix...
i like chinese+x as long as x is not muslims or malays =)
usually those mix more handsome or beautiful and....
i am the type of person that will get attracted to somebody's physical appearance 1st...
hehe...=P
so...
what physical appearance i like?
erm...

• tall
• darker than me
• double eye lid
• got a little muscle
• got man feel....
• look smart

you know why must got man feel?
because nowadays lots of guys VERY SISSY!

hmm....

if don't look at the physical appearance will i fall in love?
maybe....
haha=D
well...
i think i attracted to guys that can speak english fluently...
that day during a class i heard a chinese guy speaking english...
i got shock because the uni college i am in now reall very lame...
i thought this type of people won't enter such uni college.
he's not very handsome.
the guy i like last more handsome because he's mix.
although this guy not handsome but he look quite smart.
at least better than me ba...
before this leh i don't feel like typing stuff like this here because i don't want you all know...
feel kinda paiseh la..
but now oh,because no feel towards him,
for what want paiseh leh?
i'm just curious about this guy.

if only this place got handsome guy....
haiz~this won't happen....
whatever~~~