mum...we will be good...

today,my mum is going to england...
i wish she will get through the kastam there...
my youngest sis cried for days,asking her not to go...
she also cried until vomited...
and she made me feel like crying too...
to be honest...i did cried but i don't think someone saw it...
of course after someone read my blog,the person will know.
i don't mind as long as the someone didn't see me crying.
haha!

yesterday my sis told me that my mum read my blog!!!
she read everything!
AH!!!!!!!!!i was soooo surprise but i expected it will happen one day...
when i mentioned about this last night,she just smile and walk away.
today morning while eating dim sum...
she mentioned about the interior design thing...
she asked me what the counselor told me.
i said she told me to find her after trial and also will find some info about colleges/universities that got art course....
my mum said not she doesn't want to let me take art...only we don't have money...
waste money...
she want me to try to get scholarship...
i don't know how to get,
i don't know how to apply,
i don't know anything and most of all...
i don't think i got the ability to get scholarships...
even if i able to get 1...i am not confident enough to maintain the result that i should...
i don't know what to do...
i feel sooooooooo.....
useless...
haiz........
but,mum i promise you i will try my very best!
and sorry x99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 because i always make you angry,sad,worry and so on......
SORRY~!